"Sorry, boy, I know I promised I'd give you a good roto-rootin'," he thrust his smooth crotch toward me, "but it only happened last night. Same as with yer uncle a few years back, it happened in just an hour or two, no warning or anything. There's no need to worry, though, I've been practicing with lefty," he held up his hand, shaping the fingers into a crane-hand. "What do you think about bein' yer grandad's hand puppet?"